What makes a good parent?
When a couple finds out they are expecting and they start living for the good of the future. Buying up life insurance and investing in a new home, furniture or some other favorable life changing commodity. Start worrying about what’s healthy as far as food and exercise. of course the big challenge is making the whole world safe for your little toddler as he rolls, crawls, stumbles then runs straight through life’s door.
When I saw the “your pregnant” on the pee stick. Life for me changed greatly. No more smoking, drinking or staying up late. I was into heavy lifting and after meeting with some good doctors. I slowed down and eventually stoped that too. Eating healthy has never been an issue. The love of fresh vegetables and organic foods where embedded in my taste buds when I was born. Grandpa was a farmer and grew most of our foods, as well as my first stepfather, he did the same. For the most part if it didn’t come from the earth we didn’t touch it.
Now I have my son and unfortunately his early years he had to learn from a single mom that spent many hours shopping in a store to fill our bellies. Welcome to the wonderful world of GMO’s and many other chemical shelf life sustaining things out there. Now as I form my new little family. Finally little man is learning to eat more healthy as for my husband loves farm fresh over supper market chemical mush or fast food human engineered over salted what ever those things are growing in those little dishes.
When it comes to exercise I see so many children lack, including my own. I come home from work and feet scurry to put away the video games or shut off the television. This makes me wonder why it is even here. Kids from all over come to my house for many reasons. The number of kids that want to play games on the gaming box TV thing is outstanding. The sun shinning and the clouds with fluffy shapes make no allure for them to venture out into the great out doors. My son has been diagnosed with Hyper active disorder or something along those lines. I demand he plays outdoors riding a bike, shooting hoops, catching footballs or just running. There are times I have to join him or make playing sound interesting some how. There will be “NO” medications to make him drool or look like he is shifting into another time and place. We all sleep real well at night.
What about the parent that is afraid of the slightest tinge of dirt? Those children that stay locked indoors never knowing what a blade of grass feels like under their feet. Dirt is good! Really, please let them be children. Who didn’t grow up with mud pies being in the sun? I know I did. Though I have to admit, I won’t let him swim in the local pond. Now that I’m grown I know what people hide in them. Sand castles, mud pies and playing dump truck are immunity building healthy stabilizers.
There was a time when family services was called to investigate on a 3rd party complaint. Some where someone saw my son’s father hurting our son. The investigator came to my house and explained it was an anonymous caller from the shore area. Hmmmm interesting! After going through my house and searching cabinets, refrigerator and my sons bedroom. I was informed “the child has too many toys therefore the abuse would have started here”. Not feeling this 3rd party anonymous complaint thing at all. What if your Wonderfull child is loved by many and receives gifts of all sorts almost all the time? Does that make us bad parents? Ladies from church, Family members, babysitter, most of your friends and the occasional person are just overcome by cute smile and child like charm. Trust me the single mom did not have time or money for the toys little man had or still possesses. Really though, what is too much? Taking away gifts others have given isn’t that just as bad? What about the broken promises that leave a child in tears? The Christmas list is longer than Santa’s beard but all the child receives is a dollar store rocket. It doesn’t even survive the whole day.
Bottom line all kids are different and respond to different levels of love, bonding, discipline and respect. The parents should be role models but then again to a young child we have rocks for brains. The popular basketball, football, baseball player has all the answers. There is no directional manual popping out with them and every rule book you find are all different from each other. Just love your kids even when they say they don’t love you. Hug and kiss your kids coming and going. You never know when it’ll be the last time you will hold them in your arms or hear the sounds of their laughter. Treat them fairly and try to give them a reasonable say in certain situations. Single parents your not alone. Over worked and extremely tired parents it takes a village and unfortunately they don’t exist anymore especially around my area. Just breath deep and keep it moving. During those trying times count to ten, go outside to scream but most important just breath. Kids get it, really they do.
Laugh, love and find time to listen.